Dear Videotron,
Although I truly sympathize that business may currently be financially challenging, I find myself within the impossibility of paying bills for a service that you no longer provide for my household.
I also understand that it may be difficult choosing which of your old clients to harass with repetitive billing, and am indeed flattered you have chosen me, despite paying a disconnection fee and already spending entirely too much time on the phone fixing the last bill mix-up. I am afraid, however, that I must decline this honour.
If you would like a list of whom to harass in the region with faulty bills, I suggest you simply do like all successful spammers and purchase one online. As it stands, please remove me from your bill-spamming list.
Don't misunderstand me - I applaud your enterprising spirits in raising funds. Truly. I must, however, reinforce the point that I have decided not to pay this faulty bill, reflecting the same decision I took for the last five months. Please accept my consistency as proof that I will not be returning to your company, neither now nor in a hundred years. I have entirely too little time available to try to sort out your business dealings.
Rest assured that I will not recommend your company to any of my acquaintances, and may in fact stomp on any of your future advertisements.
Love,
Marie
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