CAN-CON - Paper Airplane Contest Rules

WARNING: I SCREAM AT YOU IN THIS POST AND I DO NO APOLOGIZE.

Back by popular demand, the paper airplane contest shall once more wreak havoc upon CAN-CON. I've been asked mutliple questions by citizens: what shall I bring?  Do we need our own band aids?  A change of clothes?  To sign a waiver?

Well, here are your answers: BRING ONLY YOURSELVES!

I've also received questions on the rules.  Some of you poor souls didn't make it last year.  So, here are the rules:

THE ONLY RULE IS TO FEAR ME!!!!

That's it.  Bring yourselves only, and be prepared to earn your way to even just folding the paper airplaine.

THIS IS NOT FOR THE WEAK!

It is for the strong.

BUT WAIT!!

I've been asked if people, whom I shall now refer to as show-offs, can bring a pre-constructed plane. I've pondered it and decided that I shall graciously accept to allow show-offs to bring pre-made planes within the competition grounds.  

BUT YOU MUST EARN YOUR RIGHT TO FLY. 

An even harsher skills competitions will be demanded of those who bring a pre-made plane.  If you only bring the supplies and build it on site, I shall be less harsh with my demands.  Slighly.

HOW DO YOU WIN?

I've been asked that, especially considering all of the fine prizes I make available.  Fine, fine prizes. 

YOU MUST BE THE BEST!

That's how you win.  And I define best based on my daily whim. 

... If this contest doesn't sound like a good time, I don't know what is! 

SEE YOU THERE.  8pm. Saturday evening.

CAN-CON Schedule

One of my favourite cons is this weekend - CAN-CON!  It's in Ottawa, which is great.  I hope to see you there!

Friday
8-9pm
News and fun from WorldCon
Matthew Johnson (m), Cenk Gokce, Marie Bilodeau, Andrew Barton
What happens in Texas does not stay in Texas.  Come and hear what we learned and enjoyed from this year's WorldCon!

Saturday
10-11 am
Sitting at Bundoran Press Table
I'll be in the dealers' room.  Hayden Trenholm, publisher of Bundoran Press, kindly offered a place for my books to be sold on his table in exchange for light slave work.  Last year, I sold books out of the trunk of my car. This year, I'm going classy.

1-2 pm
Reading
I'll be doing the first ever public reading of Destiny's War.  It shall be fun.  Karen Dudley will also read from her Aurora-nominated work, Food for the Gods.  She's a hoot - you should come check her out!

2-3 pm
Women as Authors and Women as Fans
Marie Bilodeau, Linda Poitevin (m), Cherry Valance, Robin Riopelle
There's been a lot of talk about women in the industry.  We're going to talk about it here, too, with a bunch of wonderful folk.

4-5 pm
Back at Bundoran Press table
This blog post is going to be great as a self-reminder, too...

6-7:30 pm
Giant Book Launch
Ghost King and Big Box Apocalypse #3 (Mirror Comics), Blood Relations (Renaissance Press), The Alternative News Service Guide to Love, Sex and Robots, Ira Nayman
I'm not launching a book at CAN-CON, but I've been asked to host this book launch.  I'm very much looking forward to this. These a great bunch of people and writers, so come check it out!

8-9 pm
Oh god! It's back! I tried not to have it, and even reported it to Transport Canada! Marie Bilodeau's Paper airplane trauma is back. Run away!
That's the most accurate panel description ever. Don't miss it! Don't worry about bringing supplies - we'll provide everything! (And keep an eye on this blog for upcoming rules!)

9:30-11 pm
Evelyn: A Time Travel Love Story
The Kymeras are back to share a wonderful story through story and poetry.  This show is open to people who aren't coming to the con, for $15.  Don't miss it - it's one of our best to date!

Sunday
11-2 pm
Aurora Banquet and Awards
I'll be hanging out there.  It's my last item at the con before I escape into the day. 

Can't wait! Hope to see you there!
 

WorldCon Schedule!

I'm off to WorldCon in San Antonio, Texas!  I've never been anywhere that far south, and I can't wait to see the Alamo (I admit I had to Google that, but I now mostly remember the Alamo), and I'll be doing a side trip to the space centre in Houston.  Let's not be silly by not going.

There was an unfortunate programming kerfuffle, but the programming team was top notch and worked hard at getting me on a couple of items:

The First Barbarian of Texas: Conan the Cimmerian
Thursday 12:00 - 13:00
For over 80 years, Conan has ruled the roost as the literary and pop culture definition of "barbarian." What makes Conan so popular in and out of the U.S., with readers and film-goers, and fans of all ages? Is his reign likely to continue into the 22nd century?
Mark Finn (M), Patrick Nielsen Hayden, Patrice Louinet, John Maddox Roberts, Marie Bilodeau

Autographing
Sunday 16:00 - 17:00
Marie Bilodeau, Emilie P. Bush, Guadalupe Garcia McCall, Catherynne M. Valente

It's not a full schedule by any means, so plenty of time for catching up with friends and making new ones.  If you'd like to actually organize something, e-mail me at marie.s.bilodeau (a) gmail.com.  My books will unfortunately not be available in the dealers room, but I'll be bringing a precious few copies with me (dependent on luggage room left after I've packed my shoes).  If there's something specific you'd like me to bring, give me a shout by e-mail again!  I leave tomorrow morning, so this is really no warning at all.

Oh, and for the first panel - my flight is landing at 11:30.  I might make it, I might not.  I appreciate the programming committee's effort to put me on the program, so I'll run my little feet off to get there.

Cheers!

Can-Con

Last weekend was Can-Con, which is my local literary con.  I have to admit that Can-Con is always one of my favourite cons.  It's nearby, which is nice, since I can go home to my own bed. But it's also one of my favourites because it's intimate and I get to chat with lots of people each time.

This year, Can-Con's organizing committee did an even more fabulous job than before - getting better and better!  Hats off to the con-com.  You guys are rocking it more each year!

I had lots of fun on programming.  My weekend started with a "So this is your first time at a con" panel. We were short on panelists due to busyness/ sick children, so Dr. Dave stepped in and added his stories to the mix.  Good messaging all around, mostly centered around: we're all here to have fun, don't be a jerk.

My second panel was the paper airplane contest.  That's right. I mouthed off to the programming dude, Derek Künsken (who also happens to be my morning writing buddy), and he decided it would be funny to put me in charge.  Well, I loved it!  The contestants were hilariously into it.  They first had to sing for a good piece of paper (and boy some people could sing) and then, to get extra points, they had to use the "paper airplane launcher," a role assumed by Thought Admiral Korath of KAG Canada (that's a Klingon, people).  It was... awesome.

Participants had to bribe the launcher to get the throw they wanted, so that was pretty hilarious. Then the ever lovely Jenn Seely played the part of The Enforcer, throwing little uncooperative Styrofoam airplanes at the launched airplanes to take them down.  It was hilarious.

I can't thank everyone enough for being such sports as we tested an obviously new and odd event.  I think it's safe to say we'll have another such activity next year. Practice your paper airplane making skills now!

The rest of my panels were quite fun as well. I had one on marketing, one on flash fiction, one on villains and one on my writing group (the East Block Irregulars) hitting WorldCon.  I laughed during the panels, until my sides hurt.  I have to say I was quite impressed with the moderators this year, too.  Everyone seemed ready with questions and were quite good at getting everyone to talk and at keeping the conversation flowing.

The main messaging on a bunch of my panels (except my villain one, in which I believe my dark side may have peeked out a bit too much) was: Don't be a jerk.  It's fairly consistent messaging here, people, so let's take note.

My con ended on a high note with reading space shared with Leah Bobet. Leah and I discovered a while back that we had a very giggle-inducing reaction when in the same room, so we stuck with our combined strength and read some funnier stuff.  Leah read her awesome second-person-point-of-view parable written in King James language, the Parable of the Shower.  Seriously funny stuff. I even cried a bit I was laughing so hard.  And she read it so beautifully, showcasing even more how awesome she is!   I read from my upcoming story The Kevlar Canoe, and that went over quite well also. I stuck with the religious themes.

My other high reading point of the con was reading Matt Moore's Touch The Sky, They Say.  Matt is a friend and fellow East Block Irregular, and moderated the flash fiction panel.  He asked each panelist to bring a couple of examples of flash fiction we felt worked.  I had a few stories in my hands, but Matt's story was my favourite, so I decided to go for it even though I would potentially embarrass him.  He's tough and could take it.  But reading the story to an audience reminded me once more how much I love it.  Go read it. Go read Leah's story. Be amazed at Canadian talent. I am, all the time!

Hayden Trenholm did a fantastic job as the author guest of honour.  Truly classy, funny and engaging. His first anthology, Blood and Water, is good stuff.  Go check that out, too (OMG, more fantastic Canadian writers!)

Thanks to everyone who made Can-Con so memorable. I'm already looking forward to next year.  Heck, next year the Aurora Awards are coming to Can-Con, so our little con should be a whole lot busier. And even more full of awesome Canadian talent!

5,000 kms and Many Ponies Later

In February, I came home to an excited Roomy who leapt up and said "Roomy!  Orlando is only a 24-hour drive away!" 

She was of course referring to the My Little Pony Fair location, but I love a roadtrip and I was in. (She's a collector, I'm an enabler. I could be an award-winning enabler, if such awards were handed out.  Heck, I drove her to Memphis, Kentucky and Rhode Island (twice!) to fairs, I made sure a door was built to her pony room so she wouldn't kill my infiltrating kittens (that was partly for me, too), I drive her to random thrift stores to go pony shopping, and I even brought her to IKEA while recovering from food poisoning to get her a new shelf, and even built it that day. See?  Master enabler. Or a sucker.  I'm cool with either.)

Oh, and I help build dioramas.  Past years have been more intricate. This year I was too busy, but we already have a plan for next year.  If it's in Chicago. If it's not in Chicago, we're doooomed. But I can live with that.

Last year, Roomy instituted a Marie Activity into each pony fair trip, partly as a treat/thank you, partly as a way to ensure that I don't lose interest. Last year it was a Lovecraft walking tour in Providence, Rhode Island, and this year it was the Kennedy Space Center.  I have to admit that I'm not even the one who thought about the space centre.  I was looking at Disney Land and Lego Land and all sorts of expensive lands, but my wee little twice-whiplashed-why-do-you-crouch-so-much neck is a ride hater since Edmonton's Mindbender made it go "crick and crook."  And they never answered my requests to rename it The Neckbender.  Oh well.

But Roomy mentioned the space centre and that was that. The rest is pictures:

We gave space ice cream to our friends as a souvenir.  Because nothing says "I'm thinking about you" better than freeze-dried dairy products.

This is me, destroying important and undoubtedly expensive machinery with my poor flying skills on mars.  I died, my whole team died, but it was a heck of a good time.

I know, I know - Danger, Will Robinson (I so love that show).  But if that thing comes out of the woodwork and starts yammering at me about danger, I'm screaming at it and running away. Because I ain't lost in no space and that'd be weird shit happening.

There's just too much awesome in this picture.

Space propaganda made us happy.

This had the Canadarm and the Hubble, so we were happily geeking over it.

That's it for the space centre.  We were there for four hours and could have enjoyed another four.  It was pure awesome.  (Plus, I got in a potential legal altercation going there, where my flight instinct kicked into full gear regardless of alarms and flashing lights and all that good stuff. But I'll see what, if anything, comes out of this before I blog on what might potentially be my poorest reaction to a life situation yet (aka dumbest moment).  My friends were bent over in two crying and laughing as I told them, so that's usually a good clue that I wasn't so bright.  But I'll tell you all about it later!)

So, anyway... then there was the fair!

Our diorama was a bit less than inspired, but still cute.  We brought Canadian winter to Florida.  We have ponies playing hockey, with cheap ass little hockey sticks made out of cardboard.  On the left, you can see a green ribbon - that's the top of the wrapping of a gingerbread house. We decided to wrap it so that we could sell it, and people's grubby little hands and sneezes wouldn't be all over it. I made the world's worst sale sign imploring people to take it so I wouldn't eat it all and gain twenty pounds and have to go pants shopping because I hate pants shopping. In retrospect, that was a poor selling technique.  We didn't sell it (see?  Very poor).  Instead, it broke out of its wrapping as I was carrying it to the car and landed on the hotel carpet on its side in an explosion of happy colours.  ...I still ate it.

The 501st was there, and they were loving it.  Yes, that's a pony/storm tropper hybrid.  It's okay to cry.

Roomy won first prize in the custom contest!  Woo!  She made a nebula pony in honour of the Kennedy Space Centre. It's super awesome.  This side show the Horsehead Nebula, and you'd swear it was airbrushed on, it's so good. But no - Roomy is all about brushes.  There's a little space shuttle with the Canadarm sticking out on her leg (we're proud of that - Canadians like to grab stuff, remember that!).  On her other side is the Cat's Eye Nebula.  I helped with nebula identification, because I love nebulae. They're made of gassy win.

Overall I had an awesome time. My new car, Lorna, did a great job getting us there and back. I can safely say she's broken in, now!  Two weeks with me and she's already needed her first oil change. 

More posts to come later on the Haunted Pony and the legal altercation.  Woo!

Life is good.

Ad Astra and Brain Fail

Ad Astra was loads of fun as always, but this year was special since I launched my latest novel, Destiny's Fall. 

I saw my new book for the first time at Ad Astra.  I must admit it's the first time I thought "wow, I'm so thrilled to hold you, newest brain babble."  Usually it's "wow, this is finally done, I'm so sick of you, brain vomit."  This doesn't reflect how I feel about the stories or characters (I wuvs them), but rather, I believe, the fact that I didn't have four books come out in two years, which is what happened with my other novels.  Those two years felt like constant edits.  You'd feel like your were vomiting brains, too, if you were in constant edits. 

Gabrielle Harbowy, the Dragon Moon Press Editrix-in-Chief, then surprised me with my Foreword Book Award for Destiny's Blood.

I totally got all emotional when I received this, making both Gabrielle and I uncomfortable. We usually discuss how to make character deaths worse, so this was a bit outside our comfort zone. I believe we both emerged as stronger people for it, however.  

The book launch was super well attended and fun. I can't thank the Dragon Moon Press team enough for their help, especially JM Frey and Erik Buchanan.  Leah Petersen also launched her debut novel, Fighting Gravity, and her reading was beautiful.  It's worth picking up!

Gwen Gades, publisher of Dragon Moon Press, sent us little congratulatory dragons.  How freakin' adorable is that???

The panels were fun, and I got to meet lots of new and old friends.  I also judged the writing contest with Kevin Nunn, Miriam Harrison, Leah Bobet and Julie Czerneda, and the quality of writing was inspiring. Especially after all of our useless (but funny) prompts.  I hope all of the participants keep on pushing their writing, and I can't wait to read more from them!

I made a sign for an end of the world panel.  My nuclear blast looks like a tree, however, so I don't think it sent the right message.  Oh well.  I got kind of scholarly in that panel, too, which was also outside my comfort zone of embarrassing personal anecdotes and nonsensical stories.  I was just pushing those personal boundaries this weekend!  

Gabrielle Harbowy doing a reading from our co-authored story, Deserter, from The Beast Within II.  It was neat hearing her read it (it was her first reading and she did an awesome job), especially since I hadn't read it since it was published.  

I must admit that parts of the con are a bit of a blur, due to a functional but irritating migraine.  So if I did or said anything inappropriate, well, I probably meant it, but I might not remember.  Forward all complaints to the complaints department: hahawemadeyoucomplain@gmail.com (email address may be inactive).  If you tell me a really awesome story of what I did the next time I meet you, I'll buy you a drink for entertaining me.  

So, like my chopped up con memory, here are some snapshots of what happened:

I like this picture, because I look forlorn and lost.  And I might have been, as a bunch of folk were in my room drinking on Friday afternoon, and I imagine I was wondering how that came to be. Or I'd had too much to drink. We'll now never know.

Why people allow me to help out at events is beyond me.  The lovely Leah Bobet, who was launching her novel Above, allowed me to help set up. Or was desperate for help, I'm not sure. What she got out of it was a tower of dead tim-tams, with the two sole survivors going at it on top.  You may think I'm strange, but the real psychos are those who ate the dead tim-tams and the lovers after being told exactly what the chocolate sculpture of yumminess represented. You know who you are... On another, perhaps related note, Gabrielle's assistant, after reading my When the Villain Comes Home story, said that she loved the story, but that I might need therapy.  Weird, I know.

Those are all tidbits of the weekend, but there was entirely too much coolness to capture in a strange picture-infected blog post.  Thanks to all of my friends, new and not-so-new, for making this another memorable weekend.

Now I'm prepping for tomorrow's book launch in Ottawa, and I'm super thrilled about it.  Hope to see you there!  Lieutenant's Pump on Elgin (near Gladstone), from 5 to 9 - come and go as you please. Woo!

5 Cs

Cover

The cover of Destiny’s Fall is now underway, which is exciting. I consider myself lucky. You hear lots of horror stories from other authors on how the cover doesn’t match their book at all.  The cover artist for both Destiny’s Fall and Destiny’s Blood, Kari-Ann Anderson, actually takes the time to read each book and come up with a concept that matches the feel and tone of the book.

Kari-Ann just sent notes and a quick sketch, and it’s going to be awesome. As she mentioned, it’ll match the book’s epic destruction. It’s, um, a bit apocalyptic. I’m very much looking forward to sharing the final art with you all.  No to mention the story! We’re still on target for a launch date in Toronto at Ad Astra and Ottawa the following week.  Not sure if we’ll hit anywhere else yet, but feel free to send ideas!  I love ideas.

Cons

Kari-Ann and I were chatting recently and we realized that we both met the publisher of Dragon Moon Press, Gwen Gades, at World Fantasy Con.  It’s there that I sold Destiny’s Blood, and it’s there that Gwen hired Kari-Ann to do cover art for her.  I love it when life forms little bows that match the tidiness of fiction.

That was World Fantasy Con in Calgary, in 2008. It was my first con, and it’s a pro con.   This is one of those traveling cons, like WorldCon. If it comes near you and you want to meet folk in the industry, it’s a great place to be. I’m going again this year, since it’ll be in Toronto.  Practically next door!

I’ve also updated my appearances section. I’m doing fewer cons this year since I’m concentrating on writing.  A few more cons will be added to the roster, but funds are tight, so I have to be a bit picky.  Time, however, is not that tight.  Heck, I don’t even have a show scheduled until June!  I’m up for house concerts, if you’re interested. I do miss storytelling.  I haven’t been on stage since my December Voices of Venus set, and I’m feeling it.  But the writing is going really well, and my brain isn’t torn between rehearsing for upcoming shows and writing, which is a bit nice, for a change. I’m sure my thoughts will get cabin fever if they don’t get to play with other stories, so this is not a long-term set-up.

Chilling

This year, it’s been a very mild winter. We haven’t received gobs of snow, and it’s been much warmer than usual. I haven’t lost feeling in my limbs or ears once this year and, let’s face it, in Canada we usually enjoy that experience at least once a year.  Hypothermia, our old friend.

Regardless of that boon, I’m finding the winter a bit hard.  I’ve been referring to my own survival list, and I’ll be adding to it next year.  I’ve given myself permission to hide during this month, which I believe is the first time I’ve ever done this. I’m quite enjoying it!  Roomy and I have a little cooking/cleaning/chilling routine that’s working out nicely. I’m about to ruin it in March since travels will begin anew, but still, it’s just what I needed this February.

Now that the sun is peaking on the horizon when I leave the house in the mornings, my energy is also spiking back up. Good!  I've got lots to get done!  Maybe I won't need to drink as much coffee now? Nah...

Chicken

I forgot to put my leftover in the fridge last week and, despite nuking, the chicken totally tried to kill me. Last Thursday night is a bit of blur. I remember having to change the channel multiple times trying to avoid food shows while trying to ignore my stomach before settling on one of those wedding dress shows. Then they took out champagne and cake and I had to run to the bathroom. Roomy had a migraine, so she was staring at me squinty-eyed.

The cats didn’t care at first, but by 2 a.m. they thought it was a fun game, following me around.  Roomy’s cat stayed cuddled with her, but I had my three fuzzballs meowing at me and dancing around me. Not very useful.

But all better now!  I’ll chalk it up to a good experience to be able to write about (okay, nobody wants to read about food poisoning). Or maybe I’ll just chalk it up to a life lesson and pay more attention.  Not likely, but it’s nice to dream.

**Roomy informs me it was ground turkey, not ground chicken, but I had a "C" theme going on and I'm sticking with it.

Colour

Red and blue, to be specific.

Roomy now has two beta fish.  She had some years ago, but the recent acquisition of kittens (well, recent meaning almost three years ago) made her too worried to get some more. She finally broke down a couple of weeks ago and acquired a red and a blue beta. Their names are Kami and Kaze.

So far, the kittens have been quite good. They look at them, which is cool. It’s good cat TV.

How’s your February going? Are you hiding out? Playing? How are the pets? Any new acquisitions?

Delight me with your stories!

G-Anime Schedule

This weekend is G-Anime and I'm very much looking forward to it. It's unfortunately also a huge rehearsal weekend for June's Odyssey show, so I can only attend the con during the evenings.  If you're around, you can find me here:

Friday
Writing 101: Tight Plotting (7 pm)
Writing 201: Characters (9pm)
Cutting Edge Sci-Fi (10 pm)

Saturday
Writing 301: Tips of the Trade (Saturday at 10pm)

I'll be accompanied on my panels by two of my writing buddies - Jay Odjick and Derek Künsken. They're both awesome fun and have great wisdom and wit to impart.

In an effort to spare my back, I won't be carrying much stock with me to sell.  If you're interested in picking up a title, feel free to e-mail me first, to make sure I have the title you want.  You can reach me at marie.s.bilodeau@gmail.com.

Can't wait to see you all!

SFContario

So it turns out I won't be at Hal-Con this year since I didn't get on programming due to some miscommunications. I'm sorry I'll miss all the cool and fun people (you know who you are!), but the budget is tight this year and cons have to pay for themselves. And programming is the golden ticket to getting known.

But no biggie - the con-com is awesome and barring any horrible circumstances, I'll be there next year!

So now my next and final con of the year is SFContario!  I'll only be there on the Sunday since the Saturday evening is the reprise of Chasing Boudicca.  But I refuse to miss out on SFContario and my first ever Aurora Awards ceremony!  Well, okay, I've been to two ceremonies, but this is my first year being on the ballot, so that's fun.  Freakin' fun!

I'll be at the Aurora Awards brunch and ceremony, of course, but also at:

Reading
1:30 pm, Parkview
I think I'll read from Destiny's Fall, the sequel to Destiny's Blood.  Not sure yet. Maybe from my diary, too. Little Marie's deep thoughts are always a success (truly).


The Business of Writing
2 pm, Solarium
Marie Bilodeau(M), Leah Bobet, Robert J. Sawyer, John Scalzi, Douglas Smith


I've been on panels with most of these fine writers over the past few years and they're made of win. I'm thrilled that this year's last panel will be with such great people!

I'm moderating that panel again, which is funny. I don't know how I turned out to moderate most of my panels this year, but I'm enjoying it. Sometimes it's easy - I know the topic well and have a good idea what listeners are looking for. Other times it's a struggle because I have no idea what the panel is about and neither do any of the panelists. That's when I ask really strange questions such as "what's your association with reality?"  Thankfully most panelists are game for a little play time.

The worst part is scrambling to save a panel you can tell is tanking.  That's not always easy, sometimes completely impossible. But trying can be fun, too!  At least I know that my last panel of 2011 will be a success, unless none of the panelists show up, for some strange reason (I'm watching you all!)

So I hope to see you SFContario and, if you're in town, come to Chasing Boudicca on the 19th. I'll blog more about that next week!

Cheers!

3,200 kms, Two Cons and One Swamp Later...

The past two weeks have been rollicking crazy fun.  Roomy and I started off by going to the My Little Pony Fair in Providence, Rhode Island.  (She's the collector. I'm the enabler, the ride and the booth bunny!)  We started off our stay in Providence with a Lovecraft tour.  For the poor souls amongst you who are not aware, H.P. Lovecraft spent quite a bit of his life in Providence.  So did Edgar Allan Poe, while he courted the lovely poet Sarah Whitman (who ultimately rejected his boozy advances). 

Providence is really steep, really humid, and really hot.  It's a miracle Roomy and I survived.  Actually, it was all thanks to the frozen lemonade.  Bless those entrepreneurs who never give up on the lemonade stand dream.

See?  Steep.  Well, okay, you can't really tell, but trust me, it's steep and full of death!  Says so right there on the sign.

Cemetery where Lovecraft and Poe gained much inspiration.  After spending a cheerful sunny morning wandering its messy ranks of tombstones crumbling since before their time, I understand why.

... The Shunned House.  Aaah!  See the kitchen door behind the tree, opening onto the street...

The Shunned House is for sale!  Get your creepy real estate today!

Providence lines from the great floods which would have covered Roomy whole and swept her away.  Sad.

The Providence Athenaeum, where Lovecraft spent many an hour and Poe courted Sarah Whitman.

Lovecraft memorial, erected in 1990.

After a day wandering the streets after Lovecraft (and eating at the Cheesecake Factory with friends, mmm, cheesecake), we trekked off to Hasbro the next day.

This was the fourth My Little Pony Fair I attended.  The first was in Memphis, Tennessee, three days ride away (and two to come back when doing 90 mph through Kentucky.  Ah, you unbridled spirit, you.)  I had just bought my lovely car, Maude, when Roomy mentioned that she couldn't afford to go to the Fair that year.  Roomy was sad and I had a car, so I figured: road trip!  Ergo, one of the first things I did with my new (used) car was to drive it three days away. It was awesome.

So this was my fourth Fair (still a sucker for a road trip).  I helped Roomy build a diorama (last year, I constructed a model of the Kentucky Derby's Winner's Circle).  This year we went for a Fair theme.  The centrepiece was a carrousel, which used up all of my swear words several times.  A grand time was had by all.

Hasbro is fun.  They have a Lite Bright Lane. I can't show you any pics since their suited muscle forbade it (they had a lot of muscle), but it was neat.  Trust me.

Roomy's booth.  Lotsa ponies.

Carrousel that used up all of my swear words.  Cellophane is not the sturdiest material.  We made it there okay, but on the way back a large piece of luggage tipped right on top of it.  We heard its crinkly cry of death and laughed.

Roomy's custom entries.  My Little Cthulhu was very popular!

Cake.  Large slab cake.  I put this here to confess that I didn't have a piece.  I was on sugar overload from being in pink land already, so I feared diabetes would sweep me away right there and then.  Kind of like the flood waters of Providence might have swept Roomy away, many decades ago.

And a good time was had by all.  Roomy and I headed back to Ottawa through the Adirondacks.  There are some haunted buildings in those hills, I'd be willing to bet my nephew's favourite pair of socks on it. (Not mine.  He might not notice if he lost his favourite pair. I'd go into shock. Don't worry - I'd buy him even cooler socks. I'm a good aunty, thank you very much.)

Then I was off to the cottage!  I hung out with my family, including my cute drooly niece and my non-drooly nephew. It was relaxing, which is always lovely. I'm not a fan of posting pictures of my niece and nephew on my blog, but trust me, they're adorable.

Following a nap in the swamp, an inability to find a frog (possibly due to nap) and my brother's heroic and nearly leechy dive for a turtle, I decided to attempt kissing the shelled reptile to see what would happen.  Turns out the stories are true.  It's the frogs that turn into princes.

I went straight from there to Polaris 25.  Wait, first I dropped my mom off at the Toronto Union Station.  Toronto drivers?  Like, regular, day of the week, let's drive downtown Toronto drivers?  You're crazy.  Don't argue. You know as well as me that it's true.

Polaris was an awesome time. I hung out with lots of cool folk, mostly fellow author Erik Buchanan and his lovely lady at the Dragon Moon Press table.  Thanks to everyone who came to say hi and buy books, and to everyone who came to the launch of When the Hero Comes Home!  I still grieve having missed the ice cream social.  Next year, I'll just host my own. Oh ya, like I'll remember.  I'd manage to miss that, too!

Thanks to so many people, including Karen Dales, Violette Malan, J.M. Frey, my bus buddy (Thought Admiral Korath), K.W. Ramsey, Eric Choi... and so many others who made this con memorable!

I'd likst you (okay, I left this open for a second to run after a bad cat, and I have no idea what I was going on about, but it makes me sound drunk and bossy, so I'm leaving it in.  I think it's a good end to this post, too!)

Love,

Marie

Ad Astra vs Parliament Security

I've dealt with them both, you see, and therefore feel I have a good grasp of both systems.  Why compare them?  Um, because I can?

First team:  Parliament Security.  Parliament is a big place where Canada is run, and it's nested on a Hill.  Quite pretty.  Their security team, incidentally, is also referred by some as the RCMP.  Check out the Parliament of Canada.

Second team:  Ad Astra Security.  Ad Astra is a con in Toronto - check it out.  Spent a weekend there.  Wicked fun - everyone should come next year.  Truly.

The teams:

Let's start with the RCMP, as it's the first one I dealt with on an up-close and personal level.

TEAM 1 - RCMP

I did not get lost.  I did not wander, I did not pry, and I did not even cry.  I did not use my wicked lock picking skillz, I did not open doors I shouldn't have, nor read things left about (okay, nothing was left about).  But I still was put under house arrest.

The event:  Meeting Prime Minister Harper with a bunch of school kids for photo opp.

The item:  I had a t-shirt to give him.  An extra large t-shirt, as his shoulders bear a mighty, mighty load.

The issue:  Incompetent press secretary sent us to wrong room and forgot to inform security of my presence.

Time spent in captivity:  Long enough to miss visit with PM and develop healthy appetite.  It was a pretty room, though.  Some big important papers had been signed there, to my understanding. 

Resolution:  Escorted outside with no apology or explanation.  Kids had fun, though! (They weren't in captivity with me. Thank goodness.  Mostly for my own sanity.)

Lessons learned: Bring snacks and a bottle of water.

TEAM 2 - AD ASTRA SECURITY

I did get lost.  I totally wandered and I even pried.  In the wrong room.  I cried some, did not use my wicked lock picking skillz (promised Roomy to be good), did read things that were left about and generally turned out to be confused and of questionable sanity.  Woke up with laryngitis the next day, so like to blame bugs in part, wine in other parts.

The event:  My own storytelling panel at Ad Astra, featuring moi and no one else.  When the one panelist doesn't show up for their own show, people notice (sci-fi crowds are swift, to be fair).

The item: I blame the wine.  I will always blame the wine.

The issue: See above.  Okay, really though, I got the rooms confused.  I have poor reading skills.  Sad for an author.

Time spent in captivity:  45 minutes with wine, whining to publisher Brian Hades about the fact that no one had come to my show.

When this woman comes for you, you hustle.

Resolution.  Body builder and writer extraordinaire Sandra Wickham stalked me in bar and hauled me off in her three-inch heels.  Meanwhile, Ad Astra security did not mess around, scouting the entire hotel for me.  As I ran to the (correct) room with Sandra, there was much recognition and joy by security that I'd been found (drinking).  Arrived in room with time for one story.  Launched in and managed to get unfrazzled quickly.

Lessons learned:  Read your schedule right, dummy.  And don't stiff your publisher with the wine bill halfway through your glass when the body builder comes to haul you to your own show.  It's a very applicable lesson for many different moments in life.

Points

I learned early on it's not a competition without a score, it's not a score without points, and there are no points without vague and sometimes inapplicable categories.  So here we go. 

Responsiveness
Ad Astra: 1 (I was searched for.)
RCMP: 1 (I was kept in a room.)

Ability to determine problem
Ad Astra:  1 (Storyteller missing.  Go.)
RCMP: 0  (Girl in room. She has a Harper-sized t-shirt.  Keep her there.)

Uniforms
Ad Astra: 1 (Although yellow is generally a difficult colour to pull off, it was just the right shade that most of their security staff looked quite lovely in it.)
RCMP: 2 (They had full weaponry and boots.)

Follow-through
Ad Astra: 2 (Extra point for learning lesson and randomly making sure I'd get to the right spot during following day.  Very smart..)
RCMP: 0  (I'm still allowed on Parliament Hill, I believe.)

Canadian-ism
Ad Astra: 2 (Very polite, made jokes and were in a jovial mood.  Kind of like the Canadian of legend who sips on a mug of hot cocoa after a cold day cutting down logs and hunting polar bears.  Effective, and happy being so.)
RCMP: 1 (Ya, that's right, I'm giving the Royal CANADIAN Mounted Police only a "1" on Canadian-ism.  I was their guest, in their house, and the least they could have done was offer me a glass of water.  Poor hosting skills are not very Canadian, in my opinion.  Not when there are polar bears everywhere.)

So, if I counted correctly (I also have poor numeracy skills), that makes:
Ad Astra: 7
RCMP: 4

And so, by my very questionable scoring system, the Ad Astra security team wins for being best security detail!  And that's why they got the box of timbits on the day following my disappearing act.

I feel I should add a third security detail to really get a feel for the systems.  We'll see when next I get into some sort of trouble spurred on by my incompetence and manage to attract security, and then I'll re-work the comparison!  In the meantime, here's a shout out to the Ad Astra security team:

Now if a badly hand-drawn and poorly scanned picture endorsed by the 15 year-old coconut that lives in my basement isn't reward enough, I simply don't know what is.

After CAN-CON

On hiatus since 2001, CAN-CON was back this year.  Which was great, since Ottawa was in need of a local con.  It was amazing to see how many sci-fi fans there are in the area, especially knowing that this is only the first year.  Next year should see even more participants join,  following this year’s success.

From my point of view, as Guest of Honour, the con was a success.  It wasn’t huge, but it was also its first year.  It’s just a baby, and yet I believe there were more than 100 attendees – kudos to the organizers!

The con was a success because it offered everything that it’s supposed to offer: opportunities to network, talk business, share stories, learn new things, see old friends and meet new people.  On top of that, I personally enjoyed the shopping, chatting, eating (cookies!), wearing fun outfits and just the general great atmosphere of the con.  It was small and quaint, and it was completely worthwhile.

I met lots of great writers (both published and unpublished) and had an all around good time.  I can’t thank the con-com, volunteers, guests and participants enough for such a great weekend!

Ooh, and the launch of Destiny’s Blood was also a success.  Except the nachos were stale.   Regardless, I think people had a good time.  I’ll post pictures as soon as I have them!

Article in Ottawa Citizen

The article on CAN-CON came out in the Ottawa Citizen yesterday, and I'm jazzed about it.  It gives a good idea of where the conference has been, and how it's going to shape up this year.  It gives me some good face time, too (literally, in the form of a giant picture), and it talks of my good friend Larry Stewart.

I was really happy to learn that Larry was a Special Guest at CAN-CON this year.  Larry and I go way back, when he and my brother lived in the same apartment building more than a decade ago.  I knew Larry first as, well, Larry, and not as Larry "The Doctor" Stewart, as many in fandom know him.  Larry is the kind of friend that comes to my mom's for all of the big important suppers, and who is also an uncle to my nephew. And he's a hoot.  His impressions alone make going to CAN-CON worthwhile!

If you haven't had a chance to see him in action, now's your chance!

See you at CAN-CON

Here's my schedule for CAN-CON, where I have the great, well, honour of being Guest of Honour!  First one ever, too.  As I told a journalist, which I hope she'll edit out (though of course I have to write it here, apparently):  It's my first time in your publication and my first Guest of Honour gig - I feel like I'm losing my virginity all over the place!

Let us pray the journalist is a good editor.  Anyway... this is where I'll be.

Friday, August 20
Destiny's Blood Book Launch, 7 - 10 pm
After a crazy couple of years with four books coming out, this author is taking it easy and only writing one novel this year.  To celebrate my last book launch in at least a year, I'm going to have platters!  ... not many platters, so get there early, buy a book and eat a cracker!

Saturday, August 21
Guest of Honour Hour, noon  (I think I'll be on display.  I'm bringing multiple outfits, to keep things fresh.)
Writers Workshop, 1 pm
Panel: Non-Mainstream Publishing, 3pm

I don't have the full schedule yet, but I know there are two more not-to-be-missed events !

August 21, 4 pm
Book Launch of Stealing Home, by Hayden Trenholm
Hayden is an aurora-winning kick-ass author and a just all around nice guy, so come out and support him as he launches the final volume of his trilogy.

August 21, 8 pm
Kymeras' Steampunk Show!
It's part of the steampunk social.  We'll be telling steampunk stories and poems! For more info on the Kymeras, check out our shiny website, www.kymeras.ca.

This con, the first in Ottawa since 2001, should be great.  I hope all the Ottawa and nearby fans will come out and encourage the "local scene."

Ad Astra Schedule!

Here's where you can find me at Ad Astra!

Fairytale Inspiration 
Fri 8:00PM
Salon 241
Panelists: Leah Bobet, Ken Lillie-Paetz, Miriam Harrison, Marie Bilodeau
Description: Why retell stories that many people already know, and likely grew up with? How do you use elements of fairytales effectively? What can they bring to your story?

The East Block Irregulars
Sat 3:00PM
Crowne Room
Panelists: Hayden Trenholm, Derek Kunsken, Matt Moore, Elizabeth Westbrook-Trenholm, Marie Bilodeau, Peter Atwood
Description: Ottawa’s newest speculative fiction writers’ group does more than just provide critiques. We share market information and help each other promote (and sell) our work. We write and even blog together. Come meet the members of EBI and find out how a small writers’ group works, and how we went from being unpublished to published authors.

Stories That Inspire the Genre
Sat 6:00PM
Wynford
Panelists: Marie Bilodeau
Description: Storytelling show on stories that inspire fantasy genre!  Warriors, elves, dwarves, zombies... there will be a bit of everything for everyone!  Um, not a kids event. Kids can come, but it's more adult focused.  There'll be lots of death, you see.

Cold Magics Book Launch
Sat 10:00PM
Con Suite
Description: Okay, this is a friend's launch, but it'll be worth checking out! Erik Buchanan is a Dragon Moon Press author who will be celebrating the release of the sequel to his last novel, Small Magics. I'm gathering  chocolate for the occasion, and trust me, it'll be good variety!

Reading
Sun 2:00PM
Anton's
Reading: Hayden Trenholm,  Marie Bilodeau
Description:  Hayden is a great author, nominated three times for Aurora Awards, bringing one of those  sharp babies home.  He's also part of my writing group and a great guy all around, and I'm honoured to share reading time with him!  I'll be reading from my upcoming Dragon Moon Press release, Destiny's Blood.

That's it for now!  Otherwise I'll be hanging around at the Dragon Moon Press and Edge Sci-Fi/Fantasy tables, generally running around and enjoying the fun times at Ad Astra.  Hope to see you there!